Beware the self fulfilling prophecy

One of the things we learned about in psychology class way back when, was self fulfilling prophecy. The metaphysical world puts a different label on it, although they probably don't think of it that way, but it is called manifesting. What we will begin to see in 2012 is more and more of a meld between what we used to term fact and supernatural. The metaphysical is becoming more and more scientific. We can now measure things we didn't even admit existed a couple of decades ago. We have accepted things into our lives that many would have denied years ago. We have TV shows, books, and even classes on the metaphysical.  There are even several accredited institutions where you can get a degree in metaphysics, and even more in parapsychology than back in the day.

What self fulfilling prophecy is :

"The self-fulfilling prophecy is, in the beginning, a false  definition of the situation evoking a new behaviour (sp) which makes the original false conception come 'true'. This specious validity of the self-fulfilling prophecy perpetuates a reign of error. For the prophet will cite the actual course of events as proof that he was right from the very beginning."  Reference.com

People sometimes consciously alter their behavior because they have to "make it true", and sometimes unconsciously do so. We see small examples of it all the time. The people who go to haunted houses, have something totally UNsupernatural happen and call it a ghost; people who walk around saying how fat they are, slowly gaining weight until they are obese; people who read their horoscope every day and find that it matches their day exactly, even if they have to "make it match"; people who have terrible things happen to them every Friday the 13th; people who say they will never find a partner, are all alone for years. It isn't a fact of nature, it is a circumstance they are creating.They make it very difficult for those of us who study, believe and use metaphysics daily, as people see them in their extremes, pronounce them "crazy", and then label all of us as a bunch of nuts. They harm metaphysics in their enthusiasm. Anyone who is in a metaphysical field needs some skepticism in their being in order to create a healthy life.

The problem with metaphysics today is that we have gone from a nation of NONbelievers to a nation of people that will believe ANYTHING that is told to them. Take the Mayan prediction of 2012, and the world ending. First of all the Mayans never said the world was ending, second of all, it is a minor mark that was read, made on an obscure temple. More of a footnote than a warning.  We have built it up to the level of people hording food and ammo, just like 1999.

Why is it that only believers see Bigfoot? Why is it that astrologers suffer more from planetary alignments than non astrologers? Why is it that people who really believe wholeheartedly have things come to pass? The answer in the old days " self fulfilling prophecy", today...manifesting. What happens to us is what we BELIEVE will happen to us. (Read past blogs for more on that, but make sure you don't get into the loop of SFP.)

There are people walking this earth that won't step outside the door without consulting an astrologer, psychic or numerologist. There is fact to these things, but not everything is a sign.  Your whole day is NOT predetermined. YOU are in control of your day. There are certain major life events that are predestined to happen to you, but your actions and inactions, due to free will, change those much of the time. Your life is NOT cast in stone, so there is no magic to tell you every day what your day will be like. Not every day is a major day in your life, and not every day is a day that you need to know from start to finish before you live it. As a matter of fact, if you cannot let go and LIVE, you are slowing yourself down for a lifetime of relearning everything. These genres are for insight, not a map for each step you need to take during the day. People need to make decisions, and the LAST thing anyone should be doing is living and reacting out of fear. People fear living their life without someone, or something to tell them how to do it each day. They have a serious issue.

People have taken good things and overdo them. They live not by their God conscious (intuition), but by some other human's words, the stars, or signs. It isn't the way to be. When the Universe wants to get a message to you, it will. For those of you who believe in messages, consider this one. Live your life, and don't spend every day with your head in the clouds and you nose in the horoscope column of your favorite newspaper....because you have become a SFP. I make my living advising people on what to do , so I know what I am talking about. You should not consult ANYONE every day on how to live your life, or what to expect. Part of your life lessons is seeing how you react to the unexpected. Skipping class every day will get you nowhere. Trust your intuition and use consultants to help make decisions, not to tell you what to do!

Don't live a chiche' , live a life so you don't have to do it all over again.

Live in reality, live in moderation.

Sometimes three deer standing on your porch are just three deer staying out of the rain.

Be realistic, be reasonable, and remember the yin and the yang.EVERYTHING in moderation.

Be free from anything that holds you in fear.




Peshaui Wequashimese

Someone has asked the other day what I do and my education. I have a BA from Montclair State, and PhD from IMM studying under Dr Masters. I am an ordained minister, and have been doing readings for over 40 years. I have been psychic all of my life and have studied under several psychics and mediums. I also have taken many classes and courses including a Parapsychology Correspondence course way back in the 70's, while still a teen. I was in several college level courses while still in high school in psychology and parapsychology (Stamford and William Patterson College) I graduated 10th in my class of 498 students. I continue my education to this day including a reiki aster program , in person, not on line or from a book. I have a healthy dose of skepticism...and use it daily.




(C)2012 Dr R M Wolf , may not be used , copied or reproduced without prior written permission.

Ultimatums

Ultimatums are meant to be carried out. They are not a tool that should ever be used, as they are bad enough as they are, but when people use them as weapons without ever meaning to carry out the threat, that is beyond evil. When you simply speak them and do not carry them out, they are at the very least "game playing", but to me, they are pure manipulation. They are cruel posturing that is childish and results in only ill will at the very least.

I have several clients who thought it was somehow a good idea to tell the person they were involved with, to "never speak to them again", or some similar threat. The most serious "if you show up here, I will do this..." resulted in an arrest.None of them got their way, as a matter of fact, they all got dumped.

You CANNOT threaten a person with bodily harm or harm to their property, no matter how much you don't like them. It is illegal.

Giving someone an ultimatum if you truly mean it, is up to you, but you must be ready to suffer the consequences. In every example yesterday the person who was given the ultimatum did what they wanted to do, and were fine with the "never speak to me again" part.  Now the people who gave the ultimatums want to know when they will be contacted by the people they told to "never speak to me again". Really? Seriously? Guess what! The ultimatum worked!

I don't know what planet everyone is living on where they think it is OK to control others through threats, innuendo and ultimatums. It isn't OK.People tend to run off at the mouth way more than is good for them. When you walk around spouting garbage and hate, it comes back to you in the end. ALWAYS.  If anyone ever tries that with me they are going to find themselves on a very sorry end of their words.

You can't threaten a person , ever, and you certainly can't threaten and then want to take it all back because the threat did not work to control the person. You aren't here to control anyone but yourself. Period.

Game playing in relationships never works. People either realize it right away and refuse to be manipulated; find out later and hate you; you have to play the game all your life to keep things from going sideways. It never has a happy ending. Never.

Some people will tell you to play "hard to get", that only works with certain relationships and personalities. When your partner is slow moving forward as they have been hurt, cheated on, and abused, "playing hard to get" will just get you left behind as you make them feel unsure and insecure.

Make it easy on yourself and others. Don't play games.

Outside of the relationship arena....don't threaten, don't try to impose your will on others, don't hate, don't put yourself above others, and don't give ultimatums! When someone gives you an ultimatum, tell them to have a nice life.

Do unto others......



Do the right things for the RIGHT REASONS!


Peshaui Wequashimese


(C)2012 Dr R M Wolf. May not be used, copied or reproduced without prior written permission.

Being positive

Every person who called yesterday had the same basic issue. They were unhappy , they wanted other people to change,  so their lives could be better. First of all, you cannot change others, you can only change yourself. This just isn't going to happen. So what is Plan B?

 There is a way to achieve whatever you want to. It is called "being positive". Yet, that really isn't all there is to it. It is believing that being positive will change things for the better. What happens in your life isn't necessarily what you try to manifest. People try to manifest all kinds of things, fail, and say "Manifesting doesn't work". It works. Perfectly. It just does exactly what you believe it will do, not what you verbally tell it to do.

There have been times when I have seen people who are in huge holes of unhappiness in their lives dig out of it simply by finding the manifesting tool, and using it properly, well, and correctly . They truly believe this new tool will work, they have no excuses, and they achieve great success.

I have seen so many people fail because they have an excuse for not giving it their all. A million excuses actually. They want perfection that is not possible in this natural world, and don't achieve it. After all , you can't have a green pony. They also want something they are so picky about that the Universe has to move mountains to get it to them. This takes a lot of time. They want it now, so they give up and declare manifesting to be a thing that doesn't work.

You get exactly what you believe that you will get, when you believe that you will get it. If you say out loud every day "I will get a promotion", and then say in your head a hundred times...I won't get it, they always put people in that position with a degree, they never take anyone from my department into that position, I won't get the promotion, my boss doesn't like me.....

Which do you think will happen? DO they get the promotion or not? NOT!
They "Manifest" something all the while giving a hundred excuses why they won't get it. They are right, they won't get it.

Manifesting requires:

An obtainable goal in a reasonable amount of time. Be realistic.

A goal that does not go against the rules of nature

A goal that does not harm another

Availability of that goal (if you and a starving mother of three are going for the job, the starving mother may just get it because she truly needs it more).

Remember , others are manifesting for the same thing, you have to work harder even at the manifesting.


A positive attitude.No excuses.


A belief it will happen.


Work towards the goal


Determination


Not being too picky where the Universe has to bring you the one and only of its' kind, and needs to move mountains for 10 years to do so.

The Universe will not perform magic tricks to drop George Clooney in a Mercedes into your driveway with a trunk load of cash . It just is NOT going to happen....so you really cannot manifest "anything". There are rules, and they are pretty much listed above. You also have to be ready to receive your gifts. Let's say you are manifesting Prince Charming, and you are a mess. You are an unhappy , broke, miserable person who doesn't have one nice thing to say to people. Do you really think you get Prince Charming? Really? No, you don't . You need to be Princess Charming first. Get the bills paid, be happy in your life, and then you will be ready. The Universe doesn't punish, it isn't going to drop the perfect man into the arms of the perfect mess.

Manifesting is work despite what some New Age Gurus will have you believe. The people who don't think it is work , fail. The people who do all the prep work, believe, and work towards the goal, always achieve it.

The main thing to remember in this life is to be positive. It will bring better things to every aspect, automatically, every day. This is something that you have to do all the time, no excuses. People ask "What if I had a bad day?" Especially if you had a bad day! You choose how to react to your day. Having a pity party for yourself just makes your energy that of a person who fails a lot and needs to be pitied. Is that what you want your energy to be? I have bad moments sometimes, but I can't tell you the last time I had a bad day. I choose not to have them, and I don't. The energy I bring around me keeps the good flowing in.

Every time things start to go sideways, don't bitch , complain, gripe, cry, yell, point the finger, scream....none of that is allowed. When you do that, you show the Universe you don't have the belief, the strength, the ability to accept and see the positive. When you are in an unhappy relationship, home, job,  situation. LEAVE. I know it isn't easy,who said it was ???? Sometimes it takes time and planning, but DO IT. Don't plan to leave for 5 years and still be stuck and miserable.Plan and carry out the plan!

Talking to 30 people a day who want to do nothing but complain about others, and wonder why their lives are miserable, is a good excuse for me to say "life sucks, I don't want to listen to that crap all day". But I do.  I do it in the hopes that ONE person will get it. Just one, and then I will work on two. Some days I have to take a break and do something else so I don't scream, and then after the break, I am back at it. When I have clients turn their lives around, it makes me so happy. I am thrilled, all of it is not a waste of time and energy. I make all my days positive, can you?




Peshaui Wequashimese


(c)2012 Dr R M Wolf. May not be used, copied or reproduced without prior written permission.

Adventure...haunted houses.

I am getting the opportunity next month to go to a classic haunted house. It is a little farm house in Iowa where an ax murderer killed a family. The Villisca Ax Murder House.

What is nice about this trip is that this is a place that is genuinely haunted, has no hype or games going on, and where we will be left to investigate without anyone trying to influence our experiences. It is a classic in the sense that the people involved are still said to be there, at least most of them. It has all the makings of a great 50's B movie. A family goes to church, brings home some neighbor children to spend the night, and they are all killed while sleeping in their beds...by an ax murderer.  People think they know who did it, and someone even confessed, yet no one was ever formally charged.

The house has been on TV shows, and isn't for those who don't like creepy feeling places, but that is fine with me. I don't mind the drive (you all know Matt and I tend to drive 12 hours stretches just for fun), and it is a chance to really see an "icon" up close. I have been to "icons" before, but this will most likely be the smallest with the most punch. Brave people I know have gone there and were unable to get themselves to enter the attic. I promise...we are going into the attic!

There are so many haunted locations that you can rent out these days. It is easy to spend the night in a haunted location, and many do. Just make sure that you leave your bags packed in case you want to make a hasty retreat!!


Just a reminder, if you want to get into paranormal investigating,do it with people who have expertise and DO NOT use your own home as a lab. It needs to be your sanctuary. Those of us who work in the metaphysical field spend time protecting and cleansing our homes so we can sleep at night. There is absolutely no reason to invite it all in. 

The first ghost walk of the year is March 31, if you are interested, let me know. It is a good way to get your "feet wet".

Happy haunting!


Peshaui Wequashimese



(C)2012 Dr R M Wolf. May not be used, copied or reproduced without prior written permission.

The "look at me" weekend.

This weekend was full of people that wanted attention. I think it is sad that people have to try so hard to get people to talk to them, or include them. I think it is disgusting that some people do things or say negative things about what they are doing or are going to do , to call attention to themselves. They disguise it as doing the right thing or being in ceremony when all they are doing is being hateful and all they are being "in" , is their own ego.

I had several people over the weekend come to me and tell me what they were going to do, all things they have no business doing. All of it was for attention or they were just being hateful (guess they didn't read Friday's blog). The maliciousness out there is ridiculous. So many people make veiled threats to others, but not to the person they are threatening. Why is that? Simple, posturing, wanting attention, and flat out being a jerk.

There are so many unhappy, jealous, lonely people out there who want attention and will do negative things to get it. Do they think that works out well? It doesn't.

I have said it a million times and I will say it again...when you have a problem with someone, speak to them about it. No one else. Don't wish revenge on an ex. Don't appoint yourself supreme high ruler of the Universe (or anything for that matter), and make decisions or take matters into your own hands. Do not talk ill to others, about others,  as I guarantee it will get back to the person you are maligning. You will have a ton of explaining to do. Have a problem with the way something is done? Discuss it with the person in charge, don't mouth off about what you are going to do about it.

When you are not involved in a project or event, then keep your opinion out of the mix.

There are so many hateful people out there who flap gums just to seem powerful. Remember one word, Karma. I grew up in a bad neighborhood . There aren't many people who scare me. I think the mixture of a couple of warrior tribes and an Irish temper also makes for me easily taking people who attack me in any way by the scruff of the neck. Sometimes literally. Yet, I don't threaten nor wish ill will on anyone. I don't like them, I walk away. I put them in the basement. They speak to me, I am cordial, but I do not pretend to be their friend. It is easy. very easy. It doesn't get you as much attention as being a jerk and spouting off to everyone what you are going to do, but it is much more effective.

Be honest and up front with people. Speak your truth and allow them to speak theirs, if you can't come to terms, walk away from each other. Go down your own separate paths. Keep your issue amongst yourselves. Don't wish ill will on the person nor try to cause them harm. Karma comes back threefold.

We are supposed to be moving toward a better place. We are supposed to be moving toward taking the "me me me" out of things. Too bad there are many out there who just don't get it yet.

Focus on how what YOU say and do effects others.
Worry about cleaning YOUR life up before worrying what someone else is doing.
Worry about your actions day to day, not just where you feel the spotlight is on you.

Do the right things for the right reasons.



Peshaui Wequashimese




(C) 2012 Dr R M Wolf, may not be used, copied or reproduced without prior written permission.

Variety, don't overdo, and spread yourself around a little.

The old saying is that variety is the spice of life. It is that and more. When we get ourselves stuck doing the same thing weekly, or worse yet daily, we get stuck in a deeper and deeper hole. Rut isn't even the right word. Groove is what it starts out as, rut is what it becomes, and hole is what it eventually is.

There is nothing that we should do in excess everyday, ever. Should we in moderation? Yes,of course. I mean you do have to eat and drink, but when people go to extremes, it is an issue. The other part of that is that people become addicted. They MUST do whatever the activity is , or they feel guilty, bad, unhappy. When you reach that stage, you are in trouble.Seriously. The next step is OCD.

I know many people who have professionally danced their way into surgery (it is especially hard on the knees), people who have played tennis to the point where they also needed surgery, several weight lifters with stomach, knee and shoulder issues (not to mention that for a while there the muscles were so big they couldn't scratch their own back), runners galore with knee, ankle, and even heart issues (YES heart issues), and climbers that had more sprains and broken limbs that anyone I have ever met. Then we go to the unhealthy side. The drinkers, drug addicts, gamblers, sex addicts, hoarders, and other spenders.

If you NEED to do it, do it every day, and feel bad when you don't, you have a serious problem. It isn't healthy, none of it, from daily hours of tennis to overspending on QVC, not when it reaches the previous criteria. Drug addicts and alcoholics always look 20 years older than they are. They wear away their lives second by second. Even health things are unhealthy in excess.

One friend said she could be an athlete and did a variety of things. I told her to take it easy. She was rail thin and could go all day. She ended up in a hospital in Las Vegas malnourished , with heart issues, and shin, knee and ankle issues. She had to stop. She was on her back for weeks. It made her miserable, but it cured her of her excessive behavior. All at the ripe age of 36.

Athletes have more than a "no pain, no gain" mentality. They have special diets high in calories and protein. They drink more fluids, and not just water, then you or I will even imagine. They also get taken care of by people who know how to attend to tight , sore, swollen muscles and other physical ailments before they become serious.

Does this mean don't climb, don't have a couple of glasses of wine with dinner? Of course not. Just remember the yin yang. The Universal balance. When you go too far out of it, on the bad side OR the good side, you disrupt the energy around you and make it so that you are not only out of balance literally, but energetically also. We need the two sides to be balanced. There is good in the bad, and bad in the good, and when we realize that, we are able to bring health, success, happiness to us without spending 6 hours in the gym and our life savings on drugs.

The key is to get out of that rut and be rounded, circuit training for the soul (and I suppose the body is part of that too!). It is making yourself do different things, not getting stuck, learning and growing, not becoming stagnant. It is about taking on new challenges not the same , safe,  old ones over and over. It is about stopping and looking around and seeing who needs a hard, information, or encouragement, not just focusing on some goal with tunnel vision.

It is about taking on new things, so you learn, grow and prosper, not staying with the old so that you get stuck in that hole or miss opportunities to find a new passion. People tend to not do new things as they get older. Why? It is the perfect time to learn. Your energy will increase, your knowledge will increase, your social circle will increase. You will find paths that lead to even new places. Variety.

You will become stronger in other areas of your body, mind and spirit. Most of all, you will have fun. Things won't be a chore, something you always did, something that if you mis sout will make you feel bad or guilty.

I have a few friends who had to pay a doctor's visit or hospital stay this week. Three were from "overdoing it" in some way, and only one from an illness she could not have prevented. Is it worth three people in medical care??? No. None of it.

Before you get stuck, branch out. When you are already stuck, wean yourself off, and if you seriously cannot, you have a serious problem with deeper issues. Be part of the Universe and its' energy flow in balance. Be in balance. Never act out of fear. People take drugs to hide from life, they exercise to hide or "insure" they won't die young (that doesn't work even, ask any parent of a child who died in High school sports practice), people drink to self medicate....all bad reasons. Nothing even done out of fear is done for a good reason.

Trust in the Universe, be well rounded, have variety in your life, and grow. It will be the happiest you have ever been. Remember the meaning of "namaste", and keep in balance.

Homework for this weekend...find and try something new! Who can take on the challenge!

Namaste



Peshaui Wequashimese




(C)2012 Dr R M Wolf. May not be used, copied or reproduced without prior written permission.

Wishing ill

All I have heard over the past few days is, "I will make him/her pay". There have been so many times in relationships where I could have taken that road (and still can), but even before I had any "metaphysical" training, my mind never went there. I have been on the receiving end, but never handed out any revenge, even before I really understood the word "Karma".

Yesterday was a parade of people who think it is OK to try to ruin people's lives whom they have had long relationships with. Why? I learned long ago, the best thing to do is walk away. Close the door firmly and solidly, and walk away. It isn't our place to make anyone suffer, or to "pay". One person yesterday wanted to ruin  a person as he wasn't moving fast enough in their relationship, so she broke up with him. That is fine, a wise decision, however she then wanted to "make him pay"!

What?

Who was with him in that years long relationship? We are responsible for our actions, and our thoughts. People treat us as we allow them to treat us.

It makes some people feel better for a few minutes to lie about others, defame them, or deliver our spin on things to the world as gospel, but in the long run, where does that get you?  I hope these people don't tell their new partners about the revenge tactics they participated in, that would scare away anyone. Many of them don't get that luxury however as Karma does step in, and then they wonder why they are alone for years and years.

When someone does that to you, just walk away. It is not even worth it trying to clear your name, no matter what you do, people want to believe the "bad" stuff, the good stuff is no fun! Just walk away, you won't change their minds. People who are upset or disown you because of what another person told them about you, have their own issues that they need to resolve. Take each person in your life and look at them through YOUR eyes. When you say "I just can't picture so and so doing that", go with that. Trust your instincts, not a hurt party's words!

Judge people by their actions that you have seen personally, not another person's word! The hurt, prejudice, and ulterior motives of a "hurt person" can take their perception way out of bounds either intentionally or unintentionally.

We need to never wish ill on someone. We do need to try to teach, and help others grow, but when they don't, we don't wish that "their new lover will do to them like they did to me". Revenge isn't sweet, it is bitter. It will ruin your life, not theirs.

I have people ask why the ex (who apparently was something like Attila the Hun), has a wonderful new relationship. Maybe because he wasn't Attila after all. Maybe because he learned something. maybe because it isn't as rosy as it seems. Don't worry about why, MOVE ON.

Move forward and onward, and if a story you heard about someone doesn't make sense, it probably isn't true. Don't pass on the hate and hurt.

Wish them well and move on!



Peshaui Wequashimese



(c)2012 Dr R M Wolf. May not be used, copied or reproduced without prior written permission