Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Three is not a bad number.....

I watch up and coming "ghost hunters", and it is amazing what effect social media has had on them. When I first started studying paranormal activity in the late 1970's, you rarely heard the word "demon". Now it seems like there is one lurking in every dark corner (there really isn't).

I have a love/hate relationship with paranormal investigation shows. They are wonderful for showing people that there is life after death and that people who "see ghosts" don't belong in the insane asylum. However, people think that everything they do is totally valid. It isn't.

Three has become a "bad number". Once on a Ghost Adventures episode a priest told Zach Bagans that his three scratches were the "mocking of the trinity" and that it was a demonic attack. Demons will scratch you with 10 lines if they want to.  Three scratches does NOT mean it is a demonic entity that scratched you, just a powerful spirit, or one who has been on the other side a while and has figured things out. I know people who have been scratched and punched and none of them were attacked, nor possessed by a demon. Three is not a bad number.

Reach your hand out in front of you right now, palm down , as if you are going to run your hand down something...how many fingers face down (scratch position)? The answer is three...it is the easiest way, and the natural way for a hand to reach out and scratch you. Thumbs face in and pinkies are shorter and don't reach. Can you force five fingers? Sure you can, but naturally, the scratch would be three, index, middle and ring fingers.

I have even seen a YouTube video where a "investigator" is claiming that a K2 in the red is a demon. This is utter nonsense. It is simply a reading of over 20 MilliGauss. That's all. My microwave reads over 20, it isn't possessed that I know of. K2 meters do not always pick up spirit activity. You can have things happening in an area, and the needle never moves. There are also times when it is off the charts, and the reason is a natural occurrence. The red however does NOT indicate demonic activity.

I have been looking for answers for over 30 years. Studied parapsychology, psychology, religion, and have a degree in psychology and metaphysics. I have only been in two places in all that time, that I could say there was something "evil" in it. Nasty spirits, yes, things that never lived on this earth, yes (and just becasue they never lived on this earth doesn't make them demons, a prime example is angels!), nature spirits, yes, and natural phenomenoon, yes. Paranormal activity, tons of it, yes. Most likely demonic, twice.

Please do not believe everything you see on YouTube and read on the net.Many times spirits will act aggressive, although they are pretty weak, just to get you to leave them alone. They growl, just like you can if you try right now, that doesn't make you or it a demon.

I get tons of email of people asking if they have an attachment, a possession. So far all they have been attached and possessed to is the Ghost Adventures TV show.

I have had hundreds of paranormal experiences in my life, and hope to have many more, however for those who think the number three, and growls indicate demonic activity, you are way off base. One other note...that "flashlight communication" trick is pure garbage. Half turned on lights will flash when they want to. Watch carefully next time and you will see that the flashes do not match the questions....they just turn on and off at random.

We did a little experiment once at Villisca and asked if a former member was a purple cat. The answer was "yes". The silly questions went on for about 5 minutes, with the lights arcing off and on. You want answers from a spirit? Get a good digital voice recorder and /or a Spirit box. You will hear the investigators say the spirit is "excite" or "confused", no it is just general physics.

The paranormal is not all that hard to find out. A good investigator checks EVERYTHING to see why an event happened. They do not sit in a chair and say " I heard a noise, it's a ghost". They see what the noise was, and how it was made....and they certainly don't say "three knocks, its a demon!"





Peshaui Wequashimese




(C)2014 Dr R M Wolf. May not be used, copied or reproduced without prior written permission.


Wednesday, February 19, 2014

Looking for love.....

The very worst way of finding a good relationship, is to look for it.

When people look for a relationship, they may surely find one, but as to finding a great one, the chances are very slim. One thing that happens is that when people get caught up in "looking" , they have a hard time finding the right combination, so they settle. They figure if they have 8 of the 10 things on their list, that is pretty good. It isn't. Eventually, and usually sooner rather than later, the relationship starts to go sideways. The little things that were thought to be "not all that important" , suddenly loom large as "deal breakers".

Some hang in there , determined to have relationships, and end up in abusive marriages,  marriages where the partner constantly cheats, marriages that end up as "room mates" rather than lovers and partners,  and some don't even get to marriage stage. Most don't.

It always amuses me when I tell people that there is a great guy coming in three months and get the response that "three months" is something akin to  40 years on a desert island. They say "I can't wait that long!" (Yes you can, and I don't have a man in my back pocket to pull out and produce for you.). I didn't get married at all the first time until I was 28, and after being divorced for several years, I found my perfect match. Yes, I said several years, and here some people can't wait until next month to find a relationship.

I also get people saying things along the lines of another person being married , and she is a horrible person, she is mean, and rude. How do you know how she is when they are together alone? How do you know he doesn't like her just the way she is? Maybe he has a hard time being assertive and likes her to do the job since she is so good at it. Don't judge other people's relationships to qualify your own.

Make sure that you don't rush, and when you get there, don't change. Don't get lazy in your relationship, don't enter into to it in the first place if you are seeing issues from the start. Make sure it is a 50/50 relationship every day. When it isn't 50/50, it won't last.

Getting pregnant is also no way to keep a man, it is a great way to scare many of them away. Make sure that your relationship is on excellent footing (kids add stress and if the relationship is already rocky, kids will break it, not fix it), make sure finances are in order, and make sure you are physically prepared.

When you take your time and forge a meaningful, loving, partnership, then you will have a wonderful relationship for many years.

Don't rush!




Peshaui Wequashimese





(C)2014 Dr R M Wolf, may not be used, copied or reproduced without prior written permission

Thursday, February 13, 2014

Back to ME ME ME

I probably have written 20 blogs on how too many people always self focus. People who want to be in their comfort zone all of the time. It is OK to do that when it doesn't effect others. It is not OK to do that when even one other person is effected.

There have been so many comments lately by clients about selfish people in their lives. I try to word it nicely saying something along the lines of "he has too much inner focus" to which the person usually replies, "yeah he's selfish". Well at least we know what is going on!

We went through a period in the 80's where kids were told that everything they did, were, and wanted was OK. Some parents forgot to parent while teaching their kids this, and instead of ending up with confident kids, they ended up with pushy, selfish people.

One lady yesterday complained of no friends, her family won't talk to her, they are all horrible people. She wanted to know why she was surrounded by people who wouldn't help her and who wouldn't talk to her. She asked why she wasn't allowed in her parent's homes and why none of her friends answer the door....she ranted about what a bunch of evil, horrible jerks they were.....(...and unfortunately this happens frequently).

OK, first of all, if they are so very horrible, why do you want to be around them? She thought about that for a while, then said she needed people to be there for her....Really? Why? The goal in life is to be an independent as you possibly can. That doesn't mean snub the world and live in a cave, it does mean that when you have your act together and you can always rely on yourself to get done, whatever you need done, then you will never have an issue like this. Ladies, you NEED to earn your own money. You need to be able to know how to take care of business. You need to do it well.

When "almost friendless" / "My family hates me" asked why all the people were so horrible, why all these situations went badly, I asked her...What is the common denominator? What is it in all these scenarios that is the same? The answer was her.

A long time ago my Mom told me that when people spout off ,and you constantly hear the same complaints about others from them, you will hear that person describe what they fear or know themselves to be. She didn't quite word it that way, but it was along the lines of "people who are constantly calling other people liars, are the worst liars themselves".  That was a long time ago on my path through life, and as I went along to college and majored in psychology, the taught us the same thing....and you know what? It is true.

When people call others liars all the time, they are the worst liars. When people call others demanding or pushy, they are the most demanding and pushy person you will meet. The old timers called it "the pot calling the kettle black". You will know what others are, just by what they constantly accuse others of being. The common denominator, the "horrible person" in the caller's life was her. (What was the old political cartoon..."we have met the enemy and he is us....). Once she realized this, she really became upset of course, but hopefully she will try to change. She is in so deep I doubt she can do it without help.

When we grow up and older, we should accumulate experiences, talents, friends. We should become richer in every aspect. Things we have done, things we know, yes money, and we should be adding friends and family members. That doesn't mean that things do not change or people do not drift away, however when your amount of good friends is going down instead of up, you have (and are) the problem.

People no longer allow others to upset and ruin their lives, they weed their gardens, and they SHOULD do that. There is no reason to keep hateful, abusive, harmful, negative or selfish people in your life. Keeping them and allowing them to be these things just cripples them, it does not help them. It tells them that it is OK to be a jerk, and then when others with stronger backbones get real with them, they think the person with the backbone is the jerk.

Look around and see who is around you. Is the number and quality better than it was 5-10 years ago, or worse? When it is worse, it is time to take a good, hard, look in the mirror and make changes. Be careful of those people who are always shouting "Liar!" or "Thief!", they are describing themselves!

Be the best you can be, and do unto others.
D tohe right thing for the right reasons, not for selfish reasons....when people have an issue with that, weed the garden!


Peshaui Wequashimese



(C)2014 Dr R M Wolf, may not be used, copied or reproduced without prior written permission. Pass on the link , we are happy for you to do that!

Thursday, February 6, 2014

Value, a word to remember. Soulmate a word to forget.

People do not put a value on value.....OK sounds silly , but here we go.

People have relationships, they call their partner their "soulmate" because for some reason (and sometimes that reason is dysfunction), they are so attached to this person, they think it means that their union is in someway ordained by God on High. Seriously, God doesn't care. Yahweh doesn't care, no  matter what you call the spiritual leader in your life, it doesn't care.

The Universe will sometimes put us in a situation together. It may be to have a wonderful relationship, and it may be to learn a harsh lesson. Did the Universe sit down and pick your mate before you were born. No, it has much more important things to do. YOU even picked your parents! You picked your lessons, and you picked you challenges. When all that truly important stuff is decided by you, what makes you think the Universe picked your love interest?

The whole "soulmate" thing is a modern contrivance, made up by people who want to sell books, readings, spells, counseling and coaching. Can you honestly say that the Universe placed you with someone who won't talk to you., cheats on you, won't give you the time of day, because they are your perfect partner? Your "soulmate" is not married to someone else or dating someone else. They are not abusive, they are not a person who will ignore you, tell you to get lost, or call and complain that you are stalking them. When it isn't working, it isn't even a valuable relationship, it certainly isn't something that would be a soulmate situation!

People need to put more value on themselves, some people put too much, but others allow people to treat them like a dirty dishrag and then wonder why everything goes to hell every day.

Value. We don't value our friendships, our families , our job, our lives. We complain, gripe, accuse, and slander. When we truly value, we will never do these things.

Let's think in a mundane way to make it clear. When we see an item for $1.99 it may or may not be a good value. When it is a cheeseburger, you probably aren't getting good value or service. How big is it? What is the nutritional value? The taste? Does it fill you up? Now buy a $4.99 cheeseburger that tastes great, fills you up, is healthier, and is bigger. That is a better value. Some people but the cheapest they can find, and then say, "Well if it doesn't work it is cheap to replace". OK, Let's say I buy a $1 scrub brush. It doesn't scrub very well, the bristles fall out, the handle snaps, and it hurts my hand if I scrub hard. Since it breaks all the time, I have bought five of them this year, so it is really a $5 scrub brush, plus my time and gas to get five of them.The things I am trying to scrub aren't a as clean as I would like. I see value in things , so instead I buy a $3.99 scrub brush. It cleans better and I use it all year. It is more expensive, but it is a better value.

We have to also put value on things. We have to celebrate our friends, situations, jobs, even if they aren't exactly what we would prefer. Not everyone thinks like us, and when we try to force others into our way, it never works well. That said, many times in life, you have to do things, or do things in a way that you wouldn't normally. The key is to make suggestions, then move forward.

Life is too short to spend it with a jerk who you labeled "soulmate", a cheeseburger that doesn't fill you up and has no nutritional value, and things that keep breaking (or are less than what you could have), because you are not putting a value on things.

The handsomest man on the block is not your soulmate because you can't stop thinking about him,  and the lowest number after the dollar sign is not the best value. I have heard the word "soulmate" five times since yesterday. None of these people were worthy of the term, more like abusive, noncommittal jerks.One man, to his credit, was just a guy who is fresh out of a marriage and is not interested in dating. Just because you are head over heels in some altered state over a person or thing, doesn't mean it has any real value or is your "soulmate".

Value people who value you. That doesn't mean people who always agree with you or do what you want. That doesn't mean men who chase you (and then when they catch you, they walk away). It means a true partnership, and that is always 50/50.

Everything you do today should be looked at in terms of "value" . Don't cheat yourself looking for the easiest, cheapest, smoothest way, you may be surprised at what you see!


Peshaui Wequashimese



(C)2014 Dr R M Wolf, May not be used, copied or reproduced without prior written permission.