All I have heard over the past few days is, "I will make him/her pay". There have been so many times in relationships where I could have taken that road (and still can), but even before I had any "metaphysical" training, my mind never went there. I have been on the receiving end, but never handed out any revenge, even before I really understood the word "Karma".
Yesterday was a parade of people who think it is OK to try to ruin people's lives whom they have had long relationships with. Why? I learned long ago, the best thing to do is walk away. Close the door firmly and solidly, and walk away. It isn't our place to make anyone suffer, or to "pay". One person yesterday wanted to ruin a person as he wasn't moving fast enough in their relationship, so she broke up with him. That is fine, a wise decision, however she then wanted to "make him pay"!
What?
Who was with him in that years long relationship? We are responsible for our actions, and our thoughts. People treat us as we allow them to treat us.
It makes some people feel better for a few minutes to lie about others, defame them, or deliver our spin on things to the world as gospel, but in the long run, where does that get you? I hope these people don't tell their new partners about the revenge tactics they participated in, that would scare away anyone. Many of them don't get that luxury however as Karma does step in, and then they wonder why they are alone for years and years.
When someone does that to you, just walk away. It is not even worth it trying to clear your name, no matter what you do, people want to believe the "bad" stuff, the good stuff is no fun! Just walk away, you won't change their minds. People who are upset or disown you because of what another person told them about you, have their own issues that they need to resolve. Take each person in your life and look at them through YOUR eyes. When you say "I just can't picture so and so doing that", go with that. Trust your instincts, not a hurt party's words!
Judge people by their actions that you have seen personally, not another person's word! The hurt, prejudice, and ulterior motives of a "hurt person" can take their perception way out of bounds either intentionally or unintentionally.
We need to never wish ill on someone. We do need to try to teach, and help others grow, but when they don't, we don't wish that "their new lover will do to them like they did to me". Revenge isn't sweet, it is bitter. It will ruin your life, not theirs.
I have people ask why the ex (who apparently was something like Attila the Hun), has a wonderful new relationship. Maybe because he wasn't Attila after all. Maybe because he learned something. maybe because it isn't as rosy as it seems. Don't worry about why, MOVE ON.
Move forward and onward, and if a story you heard about someone doesn't make sense, it probably isn't true. Don't pass on the hate and hurt.
Wish them well and move on!
Peshaui Wequashimese
(c)2012 Dr R M Wolf. May not be used, copied or reproduced without prior written permission
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