Manners......politics doesn't have them.

Every now and then I write about manners. I sometimes touch on manners as related to the net, but today I want to mention something specifically about the net. Those that know me, know that I don't like politics. I am happy to research and discuss any topic. I like facts that have back up, and it amuses me how the "other side" can always take something with a word or two saying "black" and turn it into a news story saying "white". The media is the worst enemy to political freedom in this country.

I have a friend who posts little placards on Facebook from time to time making statements in different ways from funny, to enlightening, to firm. Usually the former. She is educated, works and supports herself, and has a good head on her shoulders. She is a person who is a good person, and able to see good in everyone. I think the fact that we grew up in such a diverse city, with good parents who wanted us to get educated and get out (of the city, not their home), helped.

She posted on her page, a little placard the other day and a firestorm broke out. I have two issues with politics, one is that people rarely research their "facts" before regurgitating them, and the other is that they get so emotional about them. Politics is an excuse for them to fight, and feel better about themselves, because they are "right" and you are "wrong". They are positive they are right, not becasue they did any brain work, but becasue the news, political party, or trusted friend told them so.

  I wrote a little one liner to her post, agreeing with her, and moved on through my day. I came back to paragraphs from people I never knew, and who certainly don't have a clue about me, calling me "the most insulting" , "racist",  "all that is wrong with the left" and some other choice words. WTF? There are opinios I have that are left, and some are not. I am certainly the farthest thing from a racist, and I had not even started to be insulting yet.....that I can do pretty well.

 I said "people who know me know I am not racist", and made a comment on how their remarks were so off base, and said...I am not going to waste time on this, and went off to do my million other things (maybe they needed something to do too), including flying to PA to pick up Scott.

When I returned, I was going through my email and see paragraphs attacking me. I barely skimmed them, deleted them, and went on to more important things. I am never going to change their minds, or get them to stop being rude, or over emotional. A therapist may, but I am not interested. I also noticed the original poster saying she wasn't going to post things any more because she was attacked. Her real friends told her....post whatever you want. It is your page, your views, go for it.

I agree. Post what you will on your page. People will accept or reject. When things are too over the top, (sometimes their are too many F bombs and pro drug comments on Facebook for my kids to read), you will get deleted, blocked, or your comments hidden. Then you have to decide if that is OK, or not. When all your friends block you, you probably have overstepped the line! Yet, your page should be a place where you can say what your opinion is! Then like in REAL LIFE, people will either not ever "talk " to you again, or you will continue on as always. They space and sometimes anonymous nature of the net gives some people the "muscles" to say things they would never say to your face.

When people outright attack, resort to name calling, and tell you what you can say and think, it is time to hit the "unfriend" button. People have no right to try to bully you into taking back remarks. People have no right to then attack your other friends that they don't know at all in the process. I was told (after refusing to continue the conversation), that my "debating skills were terrible"...LOL, Ummmmm that is the point, I am refusing to debate with you. I'm sorry, was my secretary supposed to set up a time for a debate, is it televised? Let me get a new dress.....

I had so many things I could have said, but unlike these "ladies", I didn't. I still hear my Mom's voice back there somewhere keeping me on the right track.

What is up with people? When your life is waking up each day and seeing who you can get into an argument with to prove how right you are, you need serious psychological attention.
Politics is way too many people spewing nonsense with red faces and a voice above fever pitch while they think "moron" about the person they are fighting with.

I think we should remove all political parties. All of them. We will do like we do in the workplace. Come up with ideas, solutions, and decide which are best, then implement them. We won't worry about what the media says, what our "party" members say, or pissing of the party because we see flaws in their statements . Having a party system means intimidation. It is not physical, well most times anyway, but it is there. Tow the party line or else!No thanks. I have a brain, I know how to use it, and no one, especially a political party, is going to tell me what stance to take on something.

And no one, no matter how many words they type into a paragraph insulting me, will get me to change my mind to their way of "thinking". After all it isn't thinking at even the rudimentary level, it is anger, frustration, and hate. I don't hang with people full of those things.

Keep your spewing rhetoric off other people's pages. You don't rule the world (thank God!), and you can disagree all you want. Make a comment, but don't include spewing hate and nonsense. When things get too bad, say "this isn't the person for me" and move on. Don't stay and try to make their life miserable because you feel you are right.

Meanwhile, in everything you do, THINK FOR YOURSELF. You read something? Research it...really research it. Politically, that means that it says "Bob Smith created 51 jobs", go find the place he did that. THAT means if he is a republican, throw out ALL republican sources because of course they will say the same thing.

This goes for anything. I remember a person who always tells us how smart he is, researching a teacher by reading all the teacher's publicity, his organization's information, and his students comments that he has teaching. OK, without going through all that research, what do YOU think those things said? Of course they said he was great. Does that make him great? Heck no!

Mama taught you manners, and she did not tack on the end "unless you are in a political discussion then you can be as rude, nasty , and stupid as you please. Make sure you get in the last word, and show them that only you are right.". I know she didn't!

Attack the issue, not the people.


Do unto others.....
Do the right things for the right reasons....

...and by the way, the Universe is in control, so acting all fiery political is sincerely waste of your time. Yes it is....


Peshaui Wequashimese





(C)2012 Dr R M Wolf, May not be used, copied or reproduced without prior written permission