Reputation is everything

A young lady wrote to me and said she was disturbed by the crazy things she sees on Facebook every day. She is seeing many in a whole new light, and suggested a little restraint in what we post. She was jumped on , people yelling about their freedom of speech (here we go again, I know my rights, but I am clueless about my responsibilities).

I have "weeded my garden" of Facebook friends on several occasions. There have even been times when I removed people because I did not condone their behavior from bullying others to ranting and raving about things they read in publications with as much validity as the National Enquirer. While people consider a large "number of friends" a sign that they are liked, I consider it a sign of their insecurity.

When we need to find something to get really upset about and scream about for weeks on end, we have a problem. The accusations some people write show me that I have rocks in my garden with more brains. I get sick of reading it, and exercise my rights. I don't.

There is a hidden danger in things. What you write is there for all time, and you can make it private, but it can still get out. One person who went on and on about marijuana use on their page, was interviewed for a job that they were referred to by a friend. It wasn't a high level job, but a decent one. Well the referring friend's friend who worked there already, mentioned all the "pot posts" to the boss. Guess who didn't get the job.

From half naked photos to racist remarks, things that you post on line on any page are there for the viewing one way or another. You can lose jobs, friends, and opportunities through social sites, unlike the smart people who use them to GET jobs. The other part of that is that many have children who see Mom and Dad's Facebook page. After all it should be a site that the family can (and does) use. People have the ability to see their parent's pages. My kids are grown, but I still don't want them thinking all my friends are a bunch of  people with less sense than their school friends. Several parents I know and even a family member, have deleted a pile of "friends" because of comments they didn't think their children should see, even their 15 year old.

As to the request to "write about it". I did in a way, not about social sites in particular though. The article was short and sweet and will follow. Meanwhile, watch what you post, as it just may come back to bite you in the butt.

(The following is a blog that was written a while back on pretty much the same subject)

Guilty by association

A reader wrote and said that people need to remember that we are frequently "guilty by association". Now that may not go to the extreme where a person is considered "just as bad" as a culprit, however they are colored with the same brush. The reasons are many. They range from "why aren't you teaching the culprit better actions" to "why do you want to hang around with someone who does those things, you must condone them or do them too". The reader said that when he sees a person socializing with someone he knows is a problem in the spiritual community, he is very careful what he says and does around that person.

The Universe is in the process of sorting out groups, but don't wait for the Universe to do it. You may miss out on a good and valuable relationship because people are assuming you are like a person that you are seen with. Sometimes we are not aware that our associates are not such great people, however when we find out, it is time to fade out or run away, depending on the state of what is going on.

I recently had someone say they trusted a person's words, as the person was 100% Native American.......First of all, Native American's are humans, just like any human, most can be trusted and some cannot. Secondly, this person has a very small amount of NA in them. It doesn't matter what your blood is, it matters where your soul is.

Another friend chimed in with "He/she is an apple". That was a new one on me. I said "HUH?" They told me," an apple, meaning red on the outside and white on the inside". (I love it!) They then went on to say, I prefer people, no matter what color that are truly red on the inside.

Be careful of assumptions, and check out what people say and do. Appearances can fool you in both ways, good and bad. Make sure that you are not being mislead or in "Bad company". Make sure you are not "guilty by association".

Peshaui Wequashimese



(C)2011 Dr. R M Wolf. May not be used, copied or reproduced without prior written permission